


if the glare makes me hard to find (just know that I'm on the other side)

by byeolbit



Series: half of a heart [2]
Category: VIXX
Genre: F/M, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Warning for descriptive injuries, street gang VIXX
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-25
Updated: 2019-02-25
Packaged: 2019-11-05 13:02:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,556
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17919281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/byeolbit/pseuds/byeolbit
Summary: Hakyeon's injuries are Jaehwan's fault and if he dies, the guilt will surely kill Jaehwan too.Sooyeon knows what he is feeling and also knows that he is wrong.





	if the glare makes me hard to find (just know that I'm on the other side)

**Author's Note:**

> Title inspired by Justin Timberlake's Mirrors

The peaceful evening is interrupted by Jaehwan screaming for someone, anyone to help them.

Leaving Hongbin behind to guard Sooyeon and Hwemi, Taekwoon rushes out to help. He finds Jaehwan leaning against the driver door and trying to pick up Hakyeon. There is blood on the windshield and blood on them. Taekwoon stops in his tracks in shock because this is bad. Very bad. 

Jaehwan screams at him to come help and he starts shakily. Jaehwan moves out of the way and Taekwoon picks Hakyeon up.

“Stay with me” Taekwoon tells him. His eyes are unfocused and they drop dangerously.

“Help Jaehwan. Sooyeon bring the first aid kit” he orders, spurring the other two in action. Sooyeon clears the kitchen table to use as an emergency bed. Hongbin brings Jaehwan in, who limps but manages to walk with the support.

“Bullet to his shoulder. He also took a bad blow to his body on the left side” Jaehwan recites.

“Looks like the bullet just grazed his shoulder” Sooyeon confirms, probing through the gash. “I'll check thoroughly but it looks like the bullet is out.”

She unbuttons the shirt he is wearing to see green and purple bruising. Probing reveals that no bones are broken but internal bleeding might be a possibility. Hakyeon groans when Sooyeon pushes down and she shares a worried look with Taekwoon.

“Stitches. He needs stitches and medical help. He might have a concussion and internal bleeding. I can't fix this” Sooyeon says shakily.

“Where are Wonshik and Sanghyuk?” Taekwoon asks Jaehwan who leans against the table.

“With Ilhoon. Sungjae called me on my way here” Jaehwan tells him.

“There's a doctor. Ilhoon's husband. He runs a small medical care facility. No questions asked” Hongbin remembers when Ilhoon is mentioned.

“Call him. Tell him we have an emergency” Taekwoon orders. He already has his phone out and is dialing a number. “Sooyeon, see what you can do to prevent any further bleeding. If I can't take him to Ilhoon then I will take him to a hospital.”

“I told him everything that Sooyeon told me. He says to bring Hakyeon over immediately” Hongbin tells him after the phone call. “I'll come with you. I know the way.”

Taekwoon stops to consider it. He looks over at Jaehwan who is in no condition to protect Sooyeon on his own. He can't take Hongbin and there is no question of him staying behind when his Hakyeon is in danger.

“Go. Sooyeon can fix me up” Jaehwan assures him. Taekwoon doesn't waste time in hesitating. He picks up Hakyeon and leaves. Sooyeon locks the door behind them.

Jaehwan washes the blood off his face and hands. She makes him sit on a chair and looks at the bruising. There are cuts on his lips, cheeks and eyebrows and his right wrist is sprained.

No words are exchanged as Sooyeon dabs antiseptic medicine on the wounds to clean them. He valiantly controls the hissing when it burns but Sooyeon blows on it to help the stinging. Once bandaged, the wounds are sore and they hurt.

“It's my fault” he confesses quietly when she moves away to fetch a long bandage for his wrist. Sooyeon stops to listen to him.

“I suggested patrolling the harbour front because it looked suspicious. We called for backup but I should have made Hakyeon wait. We walked right into an ambush.”

There is no audible response. Jaehwan looks at Sooyeon who is looking at him with no emotion.

She sighs and stretches her hand out. “I need to bandage your wrist.”

Jaehwan stretches his hand out and winces. Sooyeon notices that and is quick to check the rest of his arm. Every gentle looking poke causes a burn and a sensation of thousand stinging needles. She gasps when she hurries to pull away his jacket and the short sleeved t-shirt reveals bruising all along it.

“Why the fuck were you trying to hide this?” she scolds him, immediately checking the odd bend of his elbow. Jaehwan bites his lip as she stretches his hand out and helps him take his t-shirt off. 

The bruising is limited to the elbow and looks like a second sprain which she bandages as well. She returns with painkillers and water that he gulps down in one shot.

“Whatever got Hakyeon got you too, didn't it?”

Jaehwan nods and she sighs. There's nothing left to do except to wait for it to heal. The painkillers will take some time to kick in.

“I am going to put Hwemi to bed upstairs” Sooyeon tells him. Hwemi has been in the room all along, remaining silent when she sees her mother worried and her uncle injured. To her credit, she doesn't cry or trouble them.

Jaehwan finds his footing and makes his way to his room. His knees are weak and exhaustion washes over him like a strong tidal wave. He's more than glad to lie down and get some rest. Sleep if he is lucky enough.

As it turns out, he isn't lucky at all. He lies down and stares at his phone which he threw on his pillow before lying down. 

No new notifications mean no news on Hakyeon. Hakyeon is the strongest of them. Their leader. The man who brought them together and put his foot down against injustice to protect the innocent who were dragged into someone else's mess. This isn't the worst that has happened but what if they are unlucky this time and they lose Hakyeon?

No. He can't even bring himself to think that. Hakyeon is going to survive. Hakyeon is a fighter.

If Hakyeon dies, the guilt just might kill him too.

This thought keeps him awake. He can't twist or turn because every movement gives him a painful reminder of the state his right arm is in. So he stares at the ceiling at blinks back tears.

Jaehwan doesn't know how long he stays in his mind playing out every worst possible scenario. Sooyeon knocks on his door before coming and that pulls him out of his daze. He sits up, despite the pain and wipes his eyes to get rid of any evidence of crying.

“Hongbin couldn't reach your phone so he called me because he was worried” Sooyeon tells him.

“What about Hakyeon?” Jaehwan asks. His voice is scratchy and throat constricted.

“Changsub says they got him just in time. The internal bleeding is in control and Hakyeon will pull through if his concussion heals.”

Jaehwan cries. The relief is worse than the guilt. Hakyeon will be okay. Hakyeon is okay. Hakyeon will come back to them. Sooyeon holds him and he cries into her stomach while she rubs his back. Her hands tremble and they betray the torment of her emotions.

“I am so sorry” Jaehwan apologizes over and over again. He hiccups and the crying stops but the sniffles remain.

“Please don't ever do this again” Sooyeon please, her eyes closed. “I can't lose Hakyeon. I can't lose you either Jae.”

Jaehwan looks at her with uncertainty. Ever since the evening Minhyuk and Hyungwon stayed over, Jaehwan has been avoiding Sooyeon. He can't give her ideas or hope and he is well aware that holding onto her like this invalidates everything he has worked up to. But Sooyeon's hold on him is firm and he realizes that maybe the valiant effort had always been in vain.

“You were unlucky. It could have been anyone else I care for getting injured in this godforsaken war and it just happened to be the two people I care about the most. I was so scared Jae, so scared” Sooyeon confesses quietly.

Jaehwan holds her hand. It's rough and warm but it feels much better than saying anything at the moment.

“Can I stay here tonight?” she asks, afraid of rejection. He nods. She doesn't even have to ask. But it's his fault that she doesn't know this.

He scoots to make place for her on his bed. She gets in and he lies down too, face to face with her.

“How's your arm?” she asks, her focus shifting to the bandages.

“The painkillers are kicking in slowly” he replies. His throat is scratchy but he doesn't want to move to get water.

“I hope it heals quickly” she says, pushing his hair out of his face. It's getting long now. Maybe Jaehwan can trouble Sanghyuk for a haircut when his arm is better. Or maybe he can keep it, it doesn't look too bad.

“That feels nice” Jaehwan says, starting to doze off as she brushes his hair. Sooyeon hums in the way she hums while only half listening to baby babble. Jaehwan frowns and angles forward. Sooyeon opens her arms so that he can lean against her chest and close his eyes, getting some much needed sleep.

“When morning comes, I'll drive you to go meet Hakyeon” Jaehwan promises.

“You're in no condition to drive.”

“Then maybe you can drive me.”

“Go to sleep Jaehwan.”

Jaehwan hums and she feels it as keenly as she hears it when his mouth brushes against the thin fabric of her clothes and indirectly with her skin. His breathing is warm and it makes her heart skip beats. So she returns the favor with a kiss on his forehead wishing him goodnight.

**Author's Note:**

> [Twitter](https://twitter.com/poojamk15?s=09) | [Tumblr](https://vixxscifiwritings.tumblr.com) | [CuriousCat](https://curiouscat.me/poojamk15)


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